Let's begin again.

Wow. I have not written in a while. Guess I was quite distracted in December. It was probably the Christmas shopping, the 60-hour work weeks and a blossoming romance.

Or maybe I was just lazy. Surprising, I'm sure.

I'm typing this at my roommate's computer because my laptop is so on its way out that it came back from the dead to spit on my lap. Plus, the keyboard is more like a Ouija board than anything else. I cannot believe I just spelled Ouija correctly on the first try. Somebody award me something. Quick.

I'm not sure I enjoy this new writing environment. For one thing, Jordon has a huuuge mirror next to her desk. Obviously this is forcing me to stop after every thought and stare into the glass quizzically, fakely pondering life and pursing my lips like Carrie Bradshaw.

I'm also not hopped up on anything. That includes -but is not limited to- regular coffee, decaf coffee, natural high from Bridget's ridiculous daytime e-mails or alcohol. I did, however, just brew my own garlic hummus. Hooooly hell did it taste fantastic. Not to toot my own horn or anything, but I might never go store-bought again.

Still, I've chosen an old Norah Jones album to compliment this writing sesh. God, my hair looks shiny in this lighting. It's like a Pantene Pro-V commercial over here.

I'm back. This song is so dreary I just had to look out the window to make sure it wasn't raining.

Is this thing on?
I'm talking to my mike.

So, every year I sort of make a New Year's resolution for myself. One big attainable thing that usually is directed towards changing a part of my personality that needs improvement. Last year it was just simply "to relax." Now, I don't like to use the phrase 'epic fail', but let's just say that might have to be a rollover resolution for 2010. I mean, I did relax about the whole concept of not knowing what I want to do with my life and being stuck in a dead-end job for now while I sort shit out/make money. In that sense: success. In other ways, like romantic relationships and friendships, well, I'm still learning.

On to this year. I actually began working on 2010's resolution on December 30th. And for the record, it totally backfired. But still, no regrets. Because I put fears aside and did it anyway.

The resolution for '10 is Take more risks.

And I don't mean little baby shit risks. I mean, life-changing, can't-look-back, fucking-go-for-it, all or nothing risks. Essentially, go big or go home.

Why do I need to take more risks, you might ask yourself. And my question to you is do you know me and why are you reading my blog. Because if you knew me at all, you wouldn't have to ask. But if you do gotta aks, it's because I'm almost a quarter of a century old and death always seems way too close. Right.

What else what else. I need to lose weight in my face and abdomen by January 16th. That kind of thing. I need to find a new job and then quit my current one. I need to find a voice teacher that is a woman. I need to audition. I need to drink less. BLa bla bla bla.

Man, I wish I won a Nordic Trak. In a church raffle.
There are so many things wrong with my fantasies.

And now, FYE (for your enjoyment), I give you two top ten lists.

My TOP TEN FAVORITE MOMENTS in NEW YORK in 2009!
10. Asking Lin-Manuel Miranda if he wanted a slider.
9. Jordon and I's first unlimited mimosa brunch in the Village.
8. Throwing Allison's futon out the window of our WaHi apartment.
7. Certain summer days in the city:
7a. the afternoon on the Great Lawn with Tim & Allison
7b. Brooklyn public pool with Bridg & Casey
7c. Long Beach day with Casey & Co.
7d. sunny shopping day in Soho with Jdo, even though I was so sick and puked after lunch
7e. Mark and I's strange little outside brunch in WaHi
6. Pride day with Randi.
5. Trying my first cookie at Levain Bakery.
4. When my catering crush said my name for the first time and grinned his boyish smile at me.
3. Cheryl Halloween party.
2. Purchasing my iPhone.
1. The long Italian dinner and drinks with my mom outside on a beautiful NY September night.

My TOP TEN WORST MOMENTS in NEW YORK in 2009!
10. The epic 5-hour catering gig at the Met Life building when I exited the sweep in a confusion, served my own table dessert and consequently almost got fired.
9. Being publicly humiliated/screamed at by a woman for yawning with my mouth open on a crowded morning 2 train.
8. The mouse in our apartment pooping and crawling on my prized grill pan.
7. Unexpected ass massage at Vada Spa on Valentine's Day.
6. Sharing a sesame pancake with that dirty musician I dated for one date.
5. Losing my dream apartment at 81st and 2nd.
4. Cell phone going off while I was eating a humongous turkey sandwich in a 9-person writing class.
3. Losing a live water bug (read: horse-like) cockroach in my bedroom.
2. The Oregon Trail-like blizzard journey in Bushwick I traveled to get to Casey's 25th birthday party.
1. My one-year anniversary day working for my boss.


I suppose it's polite to wish my readers a Happy New Year. However, currently I feel a tad bit bitter about 'happy' new years (give me 1 more week), so I'll just urge y'all to take more risks this year! Let's all go get the shit kicked out of us by . . . life.

By the way, I have a theme song for this year. It's "Don't Stop" by the Brazilian Girls. I'm a little obsessed. That, and with all these John Legend CDs I got for Christmas.

I'm off to clean my apartment for my evening guests: best friend from high school and his lovely girlfriend! UNT

Translation: Don't ever fucking touch my grill pan.

Ever look at yourself in the mirror and think, "Damn, I'm really blonde." Hm. Probably not.

I was looking though my little notebook that I carry around with me to record various ideas, notes and spur-of-the-moment-thoughts. I didn't find anything worth noting in this blog entry, except for a couple random things.

On Monday, I wrote:
And then I realized the only thing I'd done with true conviction today was briskly walking to catch the crosstown bus.

On Tuesday, I wrote:
'Chupame la pija' means 'blow me' in Spanish

On Wednesday, I wrote:
I will try not to lose my shit if I don't get my coffee today.

I wrote something today, and while I may find it highly amusing, it's just not appropriate to mention; unless of course it's included in a conversation between me and my cousin.

Today, I:
Got so hopped up on coffee from Oren's Daily Roast I was actually afraid at one point. All I ordered was a medium regular coffee of the day. Cut to me two hours later, dizzy, anxious and two seconds away from a hallucination of Jesus. Whilst I have never experienced crack cocaine, I imagine what I went through for five long hours today (the buzz refused to leave my system!) was somewhat similar to smoking some wack crack. I'm of course going back to Oren's tomorrow.

Received my Brita pitcher in the mail! I feel cleaner already.

Waited in line for about 45 minutes to collect some free Clinique moisturizer, due to this special event: Lawsuits

Ruined my two week streak of thinking responsibly and maintaining a positive attitude. I let simple frustration at work and redundant frustration with a failing friendship get under my skin. Ah well, tomorrow is a new day and back to my revised state of mind: No. Blaming. Other. People.For.My.Unhappiness. Can I get an amen in the house?


On a new note,
I am extremely excited for Laura to move to L.A. While I often badmouth this city I've never visited, I believe some people are meant to live in California, and she is just one of those people. I'm so glad when people around me are taking risks and moving forward in their lives. Laura often inspires me, but something about her doing it for real and the possibility of what could happen for her art career out there excites me and motivates me at the same time. Hopefully I can finally visit California before the summer . . . and then on to saving for Europe. Huzzah!

Today was really warm. As in 34 degrees. It was fucking balmy, man.
I should probably go to bed and get a move on with Friday. So little time, so many things to do. Like take advantage of NY Restaurant Week 2009 (winter)!

peace.