Have you, by chance, ever heard of sloppy seconds?

Reason # 456,099 I enjoy living in New York . . . 

Because I can say "what the fuck" or "are you fucking kidding me" in public without a big response or generally a second glance afterwards.

Unless of course you happen to find yourself at the Macy's wristwatch counter at 5:00 p.m. on a Monday, surrounded by 100's of tourists.

Then that outburst is met with, "Ma'am, you're going to need to have some patience."

what the fuck.

And now, a musing - 

People I don't know how to relate to:

+ homebodies

+ star trek/wars fans

+ ultra conservative republicans with a side of intolerance for gay rights

+ non-appreciators/non-enthusiasts of food

+ people who refuse to explore expanding their comfort zone, such as in a romantic relationship

While a few of my friends have some of these qualities, none of them are to the extreme. 

Chances are if they were extreme, I would have phased their friendship out of my life by now.

I mention this thought because I now have a new quality to add to the list as it has surfaced in my life as a problem only recently. This quality is best described as:

- REFUSAL TO EMBRACE A POSITIVE OUTLOOK

(as in stubbornly refusing to give up their cynical, negative stance no matter what; zero budging; just full-out rejecting open-mindedness and too stubborn to take a moment to ponder the positive side.)

Now, let me preface this with saying that I admit: Most of my life I've leaned towards cynicism and a negative attitude.

But lately -especially with my 2009 resolution and general appreciation for my current life- I feel there is nothing worse than an antagonistic person who insists on shitting on your dreams and personal beliefs over and over again.

There is currently one person in my life that never used to be like the annoying person I just mentioned, but now, conveniently, they ARE that person! While my mantra is usually to confront people when they're being a first-class fucker, the general consensus with this person is that because they tend to not take anything seriously, they wouldn't understand that me actually bringing it up means something. I could avoid this person completely, but generally I tend to enjoy this person's company EXCEPT when I feel like death warmed up after one of their bitter moods transfers over to me.

That's all.

Now I would like to post a ridiculous excerpt from a gchat with Jordon today. This conversation is pretty typical of us and probably represents us in a bad way, but I still find the dichotomy of our friendship amusing as exhibited below. Please note that some spelling/grammar was edited and some lines deleted to enhance your general reading pleasure:

me:

  thats what i was thinking

  doing something fun

 Jordon: go ice skating

11:01 AM me: ewwwww

  nothing romantic

 Jordon: what?

 me: u r totes not getting it

  

 Jordon: thats so not romantic

 me:

  omg it totally is

  holding hands

  disgustingim thinking like playing soccer

 Jordon: who holds hands?

  i have never

 me: have you ever been ice skating with a person of the opposite gender?

 Jordon: when ice skating

11:02 AM yes

 me: um

  then they were just not that into you.

 Jordon: maybe when i was younger

  annnnyway

11:03 AM why dont you...what else is indoors at chelsea piers?

  something active

  you could do a rock climbing wall

 me: lol

  that sounds delightful

  maybe some sex in the hot tub after

11:04 AM maybe we could go rowboating in central park

  but i mean like the kind where theres 10 people on the boatand ur working towards a common goal : bulky arms

Jordon: cooold

 

  ahahah

 me: my ideal date.

  is maybe some handball

  and then

  bouncing around on those bouncy exercise balls for an hour in a gym

  not exercising

11:05 AM just bouncing and hitting each other

  maybe we could go to the mcdonalds playground

 Jordon: ahaha

  perfect

 me: oh or how about the central park merrygoaround sat afternoon

 Jordon: thats cute

  yeah do that

11:06 AM and its during the day

 me: i was kidding about the merrygoround!and i dont want to be cute

  i want to be a mysterious and playful vixen

 Jordon: no its a cute date. its nice

 

Jordon: uggg

 me: im over you.

  tell me about your life

 Jordon: ditto

I have had far too much dark chocolate today than I should mention. Totally unnecessary. Unlessss . . . I'm overdosing on antioxidants. In that case: totally nessa. That'd be sweet yo, 'cos I think I'm coming down with something. Blechk.

Mark, if you're reading this, we should meet up tonight to exchange DVDS and mostly 30 Rock Season DVDs.

xox y'all. Go eat some chocolate of the dark variety.